I have lots of things should be fixed in my dairy. However, I also think I tried my best to do this project.
I created a new character which is not appeared in the story. She is also a scholarship students, and she is from China. Accurately, I am so lazy that I didn't want to think about the name, so I just use my name for her to be a new character in Sookan's world. Also, because she is a new character that Sookan didn't know who she is. Then, I created other new characters. I tried to make Sookan and my character to be separated but also similar because they live in the same collage. I wanted to let my character talk with Sookan but Sookan didn't write in her dairy because she could not remember everyone in the school. Also, you won't write everything happened today.
For the details, I spent long time to write. This is a very long dairy. I cannot say I include all of the details because I know I still should fix my dairy. However, every details in the dairy was thought by me. I tried to make people really in the story and see all the things with the character. Some of my dairy is very easy and without many details that because I have no time to write more. However, the senses for the character is very abundant. I wrote the thinking by the character for every events. How she feel, and the moods she has.
Also, the time goes so quickly that I could not go over it again and again. a the only thing I could do is make sure the grammar mistakes are not so much like when I wrote. I know lots of my sentences are very strange to read, but I didn't know how to change. Also, there are so many grammar mistakes, details and somethings I should fix. I think if I have more time I can do more about my project.
This project is spent 3 weeks time, But I just finished writing this Monday because it is really have many things that I could write. For the new characters, for some new stories. I think my dairy is very different from Sookan's. We are writing the same school; we have the same school events; the story is different. They are separated with each other. Maybe this time I did not very good, but I will be better next time because this is the first time for mr to use English to write a story.
Wednesday, December 16, 2015
Sunday, December 13, 2015
Went To Writing Center
When I went to the writing center, there has another person who is Valerie. She was improving her English there. Ms. Swift was talking about listening with her. When she saw me, she said I could read my story to them. It’s a good way to look for the mistakes in the writing. Also, that’s good for Valeriae to improve her listening. She asked Valerie to look for the mistakes when I was reading. I think this is a good way for me and Valerie because I could find which place that I should improve, and Valerie could improve her listening part for her English.
Then, I began to read my writing. Ms. Swift let me stop each sentence and let Valerie to give me some advice about my grammar. After reading one diary entry, she said my diary is a good story, but I should work more on my grammar and details. She also very surprised about Valerie because she said she just thought Valerie didn’t know anything about English. Ms. Cook told her Valerie didn’t say anything in the class so that she thought because she didn’t understand what were they talking about in the class. I knew that because when I was 8th grade. I have the same class with Valerie. At that time, she also didn’t say anything in the class that made me think she is not a Chinese. I had never heard anything even Chinese from her. I also didn’t talk in the class when I come to America at the first year. Chinese education is so different from American’s. There are 50 students in the same classroom and have the same class. We can not talk without hands up. That will make teacher crazy.
Then, when I talk about my diary about the girl is from Chinese, Ms. Swift asked us about the different from Chinese dress and American dress. She looked for some pictures for us. I know what is Chinese dress looked like at 1950s because I have two of that kind of dress in my home. However, there only a less people will wear that to America, for that is so strange in the different country. Therefore I wrote my character is glad that people looked at Sookan and not her. She didn’t want people look at her because she didn’t want people looked at her different face and different clothes.
After I visiting Ms. Swift, I know what kind of information should I add in my diary. I have to add more details for my diary and fix my grammar for my diary too. Ms. Swift said my diary is a good story, I still should take care of my grammar and details. Also, because I am the Chinese, there are some sentences is very strange for the people to read. I thanks her so much, that she gave me lots of advice about my diary. Even if that is not for the whole project, and she had no time for me to through my project, I still very Thanks her for the advice she gave me about the first three diary entries. If I have extra time, I will go to visit her again about my final draft.
Tuesday, December 8, 2015
Grammar
comma splice
The use of a comma to join two independent clause.
She is a smart person for she got A+ this year.
run-on sentence
An ungrammatical sentence in which two or more independent clauses are conjoined without a conjunction.
I like my roommate because she is very nice she helped me about my homework when I have some words that I don't know she will help me.
sentence fragment
A sentences lacks the subject or verb which is including in a sentences.
I think Tommy good at playing basketball.
independent clause
A clause in a complex sentence that can stand alone as a complete sentence.
Coco like playing guitar.
dependent clause
A clause in a complex sentence that cannot stand alone as a complete sentence and that functions within the sentence as a noun or adjective or adverb.
Because she like playing guitar.
The use of a comma to join two independent clause.
She is a smart person for she got A+ this year.
run-on sentence
An ungrammatical sentence in which two or more independent clauses are conjoined without a conjunction.
I like my roommate because she is very nice she helped me about my homework when I have some words that I don't know she will help me.
sentence fragment
A sentences lacks the subject or verb which is including in a sentences.
I think Tommy good at playing basketball.
independent clause
A clause in a complex sentence that can stand alone as a complete sentence.
Coco like playing guitar.
dependent clause
A clause in a complex sentence that cannot stand alone as a complete sentence and that functions within the sentence as a noun or adjective or adverb.
Because she like playing guitar.
Grammar
comma splice
The use of a comma to join two independent clause.
She is a smart person for she got A+ this year.
run-on sentence
An ungrammatical sentence in which two or more independent clauses are conjoined without a conjunction.
I like my roommate because she is very nice she helped me about my homework when I have some words that I don't know she will help me.
sentence fragment
A sentences lacks the subject or verb which is including in a sentences.
I think Tommy good at playing basketball.
independent clause
A clause in a complex sentence that can stand alone as a complete sentence.
Coco like playing guitar.
dependent clause
A clause in a complex sentence that cannot stand alone as a complete sentence and that functions within the sentence as a noun or adjective or adverb.
Because she like playing guitar.
The use of a comma to join two independent clause.
She is a smart person for she got A+ this year.
run-on sentence
An ungrammatical sentence in which two or more independent clauses are conjoined without a conjunction.
I like my roommate because she is very nice she helped me about my homework when I have some words that I don't know she will help me.
sentence fragment
A sentences lacks the subject or verb which is including in a sentences.
I think Tommy good at playing basketball.
independent clause
A clause in a complex sentence that can stand alone as a complete sentence.
Coco like playing guitar.
dependent clause
A clause in a complex sentence that cannot stand alone as a complete sentence and that functions within the sentence as a noun or adjective or adverb.
Because she like playing guitar.
Monday, December 7, 2015
project
9/1/1954
Now, I am on the airport to America. Most of the people are sleep, I just can hear the sound from the airplane. There also has some lights in front of some people. Maybe they are exciting just like me. The food on the airplane is really delicious. I never eat the great food like that. People on the airplane read the English books. Everything is American style.
I’m so exciting about my life in America because this is my first time to the other country. Especially, I will study their. I just granted a scholarship a few days before. However, I know my English is very poor and I afraid I can not understand what Americans say. Also, because I am a scholarship person, if I get a bad grade, I can not study in America any more. I know my mom and my dad can not support my life in America. I should look for some part-time job to earn some money. I want to buy something for my family. Oh. When I think about that, I begin to miss my parents. I hope she won’t be too said because I come to America to study. I think I also should buy some gifts for my teacher in China, because she helped me to find this great school.
9/1/1954
Today is still 9/1, because the time change to American time. I am in the dorm now. When I arrived America, I tried to understand what people talk about, but I faired. I could not understand what were they saying and they spoke too quick to understand. I afraid I can not understand my classes. I saw people hug in the airport, and kiss there. It’s so different from China. No one will do these in the public place. People think that was very rude.
My roommate is Chloe, she a very nice person. She talked with me a lot about this school and we went to market together today. When I saw those price I felt surprised. It is too high and higher than in China. I think I should quickly to find a part-time job and earn some money. I want my parents think I am good in America. Therefore, I want to buy some gifts quickly.
9/3/1954
Today is the Opening School Ceremony. I go to the lecture hall with Chloe. On the way to the lecture hall, she told me that they have more than one scholarship students in this school. However, I never believe that Korean girl, Sookan, will wear hanbok to the Opening School Ceremony. Of cause, everyone look at her because that was very different from American’s style. Maybe I should thanks for her because she takes all the sight from others. No one pay attention on me because of my different face and different clothes.
9/4/1954
Today is my first day of my classes. I have lots of difficult classes. But Sister June told me if I feel difficult, I can change my class. However, I don’t want to the school think I can not hold my classes. I afraid they won’t give me the scholarship next year. Therefore, even if I don’t like my classes, I can’t change them because I hope the school will think I have the enough energy to hold my classes.
10/04/1954
I heard Sookan have a part-time job about the baby setting. I also should look for a job like that. I think I should go to find my professor to talk about how to find a job. And also, I want to ask her about some questions about how to do those work. Will I find a good job like Sookan’s? Will I do good at my work. I should begin to prepare my job and my study. My classes are too hard, but I want to try a less time because I don’t want to give up too early. I think other scholarship students also will think that.
10/6/1954
I ask my professor about the part-time job. She said there is a good job and I can go to see it this weekend. It is an assistant in the kitchen because I cook the food in China everyday for my family. She said it will be very useful in Amercia. However, in China, every woman should know a little about how to cook. The man will go farming outside and woman should stay in the home and cook and take care of the babies. Even it change a lot but most of the woman will learn a little about cooking. I am very lucky because people think woman doesn’t need to study, but my family don’t think so. They took me to the school and give me the good education.
10/9/1954
Today is the day I go to see that restaurant. I wear the most fashion dress I think and went to that restaurant. When I stand in front of that restaurant, I know this must be a very popular place for people to have meal. Everything, include the door and some small flower here will make people feel very relax and want to have meal here. I go into the restaurant quickly. When the cooker see me, he just ask me to cook something for him to taste. I am so nervous at that time because I never cook for the others except my family. I do everything carefully and look at the cooker many times like a cat. When he taste my food, I just feel my heart isn’t in my body. But after he eat the food, he smiled at me that I never see that. He told me I can go to do my work next weekend. I am so happy even I think I will be very busy after next weekend.
10/16/1954
This is my first time to do the job in America. My job is cooking some Chinese food for the people and help cooker to prepare the vegetables, meats and etc. I am so exciting today because lots of people think Chinese food is very delicious and give me some fee. Except the money I got everyday, I get 26 dollars today from the gusts. The cooker also says that he likes Chinese food and I am so good at cooking. He is very serious person and just smile few times, but he smiles today at me that makes me very proud of that.
11/10/1954
I write a letter for my family today. I give the letter for the people who is in the school and manager the letter and help us to send and receive it. I tell my mom and dad I am good in the school and don't worry me. I tell them I get a good job in a restaurant. People like my food and the cooker is good for me. I should thanks for them that they teach me how to cook. I also tell them, I will quickly buy some gifts in America for them and let them know I am good in America. In the letter, I tell them don't worry about my study. I will do well and try everything by my best.
11/17/1954
Thanksgiving will coming, I don't will can I go because everyone go back to their home. I cannot go back to China because that's too far away and that will cost too much money. Also, I cannot stay in the school because everyone will go back home. There's no teacher here and all the dorm will be closed. Chloe tells me that I can go to her home, but I'm afraid that her family will think I am the problems. I ask another international student Sookan. She says she will go to Ellen's home. I think that will be a good ideal to go to my roommate's home. I will just her tomorrow.
11/18/1954
I am so happy! Chloe says I can go to her home and her family is really welcome me. I am so happy because that means I have things to do in my first thanksgiving break. I am prepare about my thanksgiving break now because we just have 3 days left. I take the clothes from China and want to give a surprise for Chloe and her family. I heard that she has a older brother and a younger sister. I am so envious about that because I don't have any brother and sister. I expect the life in her home.
Now, I am on the airport to America. Most of the people are sleep, I just can hear the sound from the airplane. There also has some lights in front of some people. Maybe they are exciting just like me. The food on the airplane is really delicious. I never eat the great food like that. People on the airplane read the English books. Everything is American style.
I’m so exciting about my life in America because this is my first time to the other country. Especially, I will study their. I just granted a scholarship a few days before. However, I know my English is very poor and I afraid I can not understand what Americans say. Also, because I am a scholarship person, if I get a bad grade, I can not study in America any more. I know my mom and my dad can not support my life in America. I should look for some part-time job to earn some money. I want to buy something for my family. Oh. When I think about that, I begin to miss my parents. I hope she won’t be too said because I come to America to study. I think I also should buy some gifts for my teacher in China, because she helped me to find this great school.
9/1/1954
Today is still 9/1, because the time change to American time. I am in the dorm now. When I arrived America, I tried to understand what people talk about, but I faired. I could not understand what were they saying and they spoke too quick to understand. I afraid I can not understand my classes. I saw people hug in the airport, and kiss there. It’s so different from China. No one will do these in the public place. People think that was very rude.
My roommate is Chloe, she a very nice person. She talked with me a lot about this school and we went to market together today. When I saw those price I felt surprised. It is too high and higher than in China. I think I should quickly to find a part-time job and earn some money. I want my parents think I am good in America. Therefore, I want to buy some gifts quickly.
9/3/1954
Today is the Opening School Ceremony. I go to the lecture hall with Chloe. On the way to the lecture hall, she told me that they have more than one scholarship students in this school. However, I never believe that Korean girl, Sookan, will wear hanbok to the Opening School Ceremony. Of cause, everyone look at her because that was very different from American’s style. Maybe I should thanks for her because she takes all the sight from others. No one pay attention on me because of my different face and different clothes.
9/4/1954
Today is my first day of my classes. I have lots of difficult classes. But Sister June told me if I feel difficult, I can change my class. However, I don’t want to the school think I can not hold my classes. I afraid they won’t give me the scholarship next year. Therefore, even if I don’t like my classes, I can’t change them because I hope the school will think I have the enough energy to hold my classes.
10/04/1954
I heard Sookan have a part-time job about the baby setting. I also should look for a job like that. I think I should go to find my professor to talk about how to find a job. And also, I want to ask her about some questions about how to do those work. Will I find a good job like Sookan’s? Will I do good at my work. I should begin to prepare my job and my study. My classes are too hard, but I want to try a less time because I don’t want to give up too early. I think other scholarship students also will think that.
10/6/1954
I ask my professor about the part-time job. She said there is a good job and I can go to see it this weekend. It is an assistant in the kitchen because I cook the food in China everyday for my family. She said it will be very useful in Amercia. However, in China, every woman should know a little about how to cook. The man will go farming outside and woman should stay in the home and cook and take care of the babies. Even it change a lot but most of the woman will learn a little about cooking. I am very lucky because people think woman doesn’t need to study, but my family don’t think so. They took me to the school and give me the good education.
10/9/1954
Today is the day I go to see that restaurant. I wear the most fashion dress I think and went to that restaurant. When I stand in front of that restaurant, I know this must be a very popular place for people to have meal. Everything, include the door and some small flower here will make people feel very relax and want to have meal here. I go into the restaurant quickly. When the cooker see me, he just ask me to cook something for him to taste. I am so nervous at that time because I never cook for the others except my family. I do everything carefully and look at the cooker many times like a cat. When he taste my food, I just feel my heart isn’t in my body. But after he eat the food, he smiled at me that I never see that. He told me I can go to do my work next weekend. I am so happy even I think I will be very busy after next weekend.
10/16/1954
This is my first time to do the job in America. My job is cooking some Chinese food for the people and help cooker to prepare the vegetables, meats and etc. I am so exciting today because lots of people think Chinese food is very delicious and give me some fee. Except the money I got everyday, I get 26 dollars today from the gusts. The cooker also says that he likes Chinese food and I am so good at cooking. He is very serious person and just smile few times, but he smiles today at me that makes me very proud of that.
11/10/1954
I write a letter for my family today. I give the letter for the people who is in the school and manager the letter and help us to send and receive it. I tell my mom and dad I am good in the school and don't worry me. I tell them I get a good job in a restaurant. People like my food and the cooker is good for me. I should thanks for them that they teach me how to cook. I also tell them, I will quickly buy some gifts in America for them and let them know I am good in America. In the letter, I tell them don't worry about my study. I will do well and try everything by my best.
11/17/1954
Thanksgiving will coming, I don't will can I go because everyone go back to their home. I cannot go back to China because that's too far away and that will cost too much money. Also, I cannot stay in the school because everyone will go back home. There's no teacher here and all the dorm will be closed. Chloe tells me that I can go to her home, but I'm afraid that her family will think I am the problems. I ask another international student Sookan. She says she will go to Ellen's home. I think that will be a good ideal to go to my roommate's home. I will just her tomorrow.
11/18/1954
I am so happy! Chloe says I can go to her home and her family is really welcome me. I am so happy because that means I have things to do in my first thanksgiving break. I am prepare about my thanksgiving break now because we just have 3 days left. I take the clothes from China and want to give a surprise for Chloe and her family. I heard that she has a older brother and a younger sister. I am so envious about that because I don't have any brother and sister. I expect the life in her home.
Tuesday, December 1, 2015
Diary Entry
11/21
Second day, I went to Princeton. My mom took me to see her friends. They are very nice. We went to one of her friends' house. She cooked lots of food for us. When I went into the house, there has lots of smell of the spices. However, I didn't like those food too much, because there's no Chinese food on the desk. She has a daughter who is born in America but she could speak a little Chinese. My mom doesn't speak English so her friend called her daughter to speak Chinese with us. I thought her daughter doesn't like speaking Chinese so I tried to chat with her in English. She said there was a cat slept on her coat because her coat is really soft. I touched it. It likes make by silk and is accurately very soft. She also gave me lots of book to read and played game with me on book. When we should go, she looks a little bit grieved. It made me have the sense of achievement.
My Great Thanksgiving
during this break, my mom come to the US. First, we went to New York and went shopping there. The interesting things so that she ordered a hotel which is near the Time Square. As we know ISIS, my cousin heard we would live there and worried us. However, nothing happened then. Second day, I went to Princeton. My mom took me to see her friends. They are very nice. We went to one of her friends' house. She has a daughter who is born in America but she could speak Chinese. My mom doesn't speak English so her friend called her daughter to speak Chinese with us. I thought her daughter doesn't like speaking Chinese so I tried to chat with her in English. She gave me lots of book to see and played game with me on book. When we should go, she looks a little bit grieved. It made me have the sense of achievement. Then, we back to New York. My mom and her sister said they wanted to go shopping tomorrow but I felt tied so I said I would go to find my friends in New York. Accurately, I went to find my boyfriend. We had dinner together then I waited for my mom to 10 o'clock. At the next 2 days, we were in the LA. My cousin was there. She took us ate lots of good Japanese food and Korean BBQ. I thought I got fatter and fatter. Letter, we went to San Francisco with my cousin. She took two friends went there together. I never go shopping with them even if it was Black Friday, because I got sick and lie on the bed for two days. That's my great holiday. However, the regret is that I didn't eat Turkey at this Thanksgiving.
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